Guess what suffered? I found myself wanting to jump ship, start writing a new project because the first part of writing is like the first part of dating. We get all giddy and excited and want to tell everyone about the fun things we are discovering. But the writing relationship is really more like marriage than dating, and I've been married for 13 years, so I've learned a few things about how to keep a relationship strong. The number one issue is keeping the priorities where they belong.
I can commend myself for not having watched TV in a week or two. But I have found some fun games to play on my tablet and my phone when I could have been writing. I can excuse my lack of commitment to writing because of my new work schedule, but I work for 10 months out of the year, so that won't lead to a healthy relationship. I can make excuses all day long that are probably valid, but excuses don't make dreams come true.This is the point of posts where people often post these ridiculous goals, like I won't go to sleep until I've written _____ words in a day. That's like my husband and I making a goal to go out to eat once a week without the kids. In a dream world, it would be nice, but that's not my reality.
The reality is that my marriage is still going strong because husband and I work through our frustrations, talk to each other, recommit SEVERAL times a year and learn how to stop making certain mistakes. Some of the mistakes take longer to figure out how to stop making. But we haven't thrown in the towel because the thing we have together is so much greater than that.
That's what needs to be said about our writing too.
What transitions have you gone through in your writing? How do you keep the relationship between you and your WIP strong?
Tasha Seegmiller
I'm a teacher, mom, wife and writer. I love owls and run on Diet Coke, cinnamon bears and words.
Writing is like a relationship - you get out of it what you put into it, and if you don't put anything into it, it dies.
ReplyDeleteVery very trued. Thanks!
DeleteMy relationship to writing is an undercurrent in my life. It's always there, even when I'm not writing. I know it will always be there, just like my sweetie.
ReplyDeleteI'm impressed with your confidence. I'm not quite there yet. Thanks for sharing!
DeleteI find myself recommitting all the time! A constant battle for time and energy
ReplyDeleteThat energy thing is sometimes more of a killer than anything. Thanks!
DeleteAll of this is so true! About marriage and writing and how marriage relates to writing. so true, so true! I have to make myself give my writing ten minutes a day. That's not very much so it's an easy commitment to make. Most of the time that ten minutes turns into an hour or more which is how I get things done. Sometimes I am watching the clock but most days not. I have a really big internet surfing problem myself which is hard! LOL.
ReplyDeleteIt is a tricky thing, working out our commitment to writing. But it is so worth it!
DeleteOh my marriage was in serious trouble last week (my writing marriage;)...I was basically ready to file for divorce! But I've "recommitted" and ready to have some mind-blowing make-up....writing! haha, I am so dirty!
ReplyDeleteJessie, sometimes you just make my heart happy. I hope all your make-up...whatever goes well :)
DeleteI only watch TV in the fall, so I haven't really been watching much for awhile. I'm coming up on my hard months.
ReplyDeleteYup - I'm a teacher. I so get the hard months. Hope yours go well.
DeleteGreat analogy. I think I've made it past the rocky moments in my writing relationship. We're old and comfortable together.
ReplyDeleteThat is a glorious thing, but I hope you still have moments with sparks :)
DeleteI love this in so many, many ways. And the analogy is . . . WOW. Never seen writing put into that perspective but it's perfect. Thanks so much for sharing this Tasha! And good luck finding your new stride!
ReplyDeleteThanks dear! I really appreciate your never ending kindness and support.
DeleteI'm currently having to go through the recommitting stage. I keep reminding myself that the story is my friend, not my arch-nemesis bent on killing me or driving me completely insane. I think it would be happy with either at this point.:O Thanks for the analogy and reminder that I'm here for the long haul.
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